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Talaq! Talaq! Talaq!

“Talaq! Talaq! Talaq!” Is that really easy to divorce a wife just pronounce this words three times with immediate effect? According to Sura At-Talaq 65:1-7 has clearly mentioned that if a man declare Talaq, he has to wait for three months, so-called “waiting time” to ensure the woman is not pregnant for his baby. He cannot kick her out of the home or lock the home to refuse her back except she’s committing a clear immorality. He has to maintain her as usual at home. However, if any sexual intercourse happens during this waiting time, the marriage will be reinstated automatically.

During this waiting time, it is suggested trying to retain the wife; otherwise separate with her according to acceptable terms with two just men to witness and establish the testimony.

If the wife is found pregnant during this waiting time, the man has to keep her at home until the baby is born. The man has to responsible for all the expenses during the waiting time no matter she’s pregnant or not. Also compensate the woman if she feeds the baby. But if you cannot bear with each other then let another woman suckle the baby for you.

Below is the surah quoted for your reference. It’s so clear that Taqwa (awareness of Allah) is so important during this divorce process. Allah has given clear instructions and women’s rights during this process in the Quran. If anyone simply declare talaq three times at a time and refuse to take the woman back or push her out of the home, he is clearly not following Islam.

At-Talaq (Divorce)
Translation the Clear Quran
(65:1) O Prophet! [Instruct the believers:] When you [intend to] divorce women, then divorce them with concern for their waiting period, and count it accurately. And fear God, your Lord.  Do not force them out of their homes, nor should they leave – unless they commit a blatant misconduct.  These are the limits set by God.  And whoever transgresses God’s limits has truly wronged his own soul.  You never know, perhaps God will bring about a change [of heart] later.
(65:2) Then when they have [almost] reached the end of their waiting period, either retain them honourably or separate from them honourably.  And call two of your reliable men to witness [either way] – and [let the witnesses] bear true testimony for [the sake of] God. This is enjoined on whoever has faith in God and the Last Day.  And whoever is mindful of God, He will make a way out for them, 
(65:3) and provide for them from sources they could never imagine.  And whoever puts their trust in God, then He [alone] is sufficient for them. Certainly God achieves His Will.  God has already set a destiny for everything.
(65:4) As for your women past the age of menstruation, in case you do not know, their waiting period is three months, and those who have not menstruated as well.  As for those who are pregnant, their waiting period ends with delivery.  And whoever is mindful of God, He will make their matters easy for them.
(65:5) This is the commandment of God, which He has revealed to you.  And whoever is mindful of God, He will absolve them of their sins and reward them immensely.
(65:6) Let them live where you live [during their waiting period], according to your means.  And do not harass them to make their stay unbearable.  If they are pregnant, then maintain them until they deliver.  And if they nurse your child, compensate them, and consult together courteously.  But if you fail to reach an agreement, then another woman will nurse [the child] for the father.
(65:7) Let the man of wealth provide according to his means.  As for the one with limited resources, let him provide according to whatever God has given him.  God does not require of any soul beyond what He has given it.  After hardship, God will bring about ease.

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Christmas… as a convert

By Megan Wyatt

‘I’ve cried in a lot of places during the “holiday season.” As a convert who left behind many traditions that come with the holiday season, I was left with longing and, sometimes, loneliness. I wrote an ebook, shared below, to help others in the same boat. One year I remember hearing a Christmas song playing while eating lunch out with my husband and kids, and just like that, the nostalgia hit me and I just welled up with tears. It’s been over 20 years since I became Muslim and it’s taken about that long to finally not feel sad.

My life is rich, alhamdulilah, as is my family life and our own traditions and so I am happy and content. But the feeling is still there sometimes. It’s a sign of beautiful memories with my family growing up. It’s part of the test that a convert goes through. We don’t need pity or to pity ourselves. We’ve chosen the greatest gift there is in the world: the know our Creator as He truly is. But compassion goes a long way. Suggestions to ease this time of year for converts you might know:

1) Drop a text or a phone call to anyone you know who is a convert. Let them know you recognize this time of year is difficult for many converts and ask how they are doing. Maybe invite them out for some of those seasonal flavors of coffee, cocoa, and desserts!

2) If you are married to a convert don’t shame them for their feelings. Don’t talk about how all those traditions are rooted in haram ideaas, pagan history, etc etc etc. They know. They get it. They chose Islam, remember? Instead, offer a hug, maybe take a drive just to look at lights together, and listen. Just listen. Part of grief is just feeling and processing. Be gentle.

3) Consider hosting gatherings in your home somewhere between 12/24-12/27 to give converts something positive to look forward to. Make it a potluck or just make all your friends cook and say “converts come free handed!” Trust me, the gestures will be really meaningful for them.

4) Remind converts of all the positive ways they can and should stay connected to their families during this time. Many teachers encourage people to still attend holiday dinners and lunches in order to maintain familial ties. Educate yourself on this subject with teachers who are in touch with the converts in their community. (Do not copy/paste fatwas from people who live in muslim lands who have no idea how to support converts!)

5) Download the ebook or share this post with others: http://marketives.com/client/holidayseason/download-page/e-book/WhenHolidayNostalgiaCreatesSaddness.pdf

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Marriage is…

From Maryam Amir Facebook 

Marriage is not a cure for your addiction. Or your depression. Or your trauma. Or or or… a person you marry is not a tool to fix your problems. And by fixating on marriage as a balm for your gaping wounds, you can painfully wrong another.

Folks must work on self-development without waiting for marriage to miraculously fill their gaping wounds. Go to therapy, get your health together, enroll in a rehab program now.

On a spiritual level, if you aren’t waking up for fajr now but gush about how you can’t wait for Mr or Mrs Perfect Muslim to gently sprinkle water on your face for qiyam… keep a cup of water next to you in bed so that you can drench yourself and WAKE UP. How can you rely for the appearance of a person who doesn’t yet exist in your life in this role to take responsibility for your worship? YOU wake you up! YOU be the worshipper you wish you could be!

Marriage can be a great tool of self-improvement and can help us change for the best, with God’s will. A blissful marriage is a great blessing from God and the creation and care of a family is a great act of worship. The right spouse can truly *help* (not be the end all) you find a sense of wholeness and healing and comprehensive support and sometimes a sense of loving even your greatest insecurities. 
But you cannot expect that to *come* from someone else. That isn’t your spouse’s responsibility. You can’t want to get married so someone else heals you. God is the only One Who deserves that level of trust.

Work on your relationship with Him, work on your own mental, physical, spiritual, psychological nurturing and become the type of person you want to marry. And be the type of person someone else would thank God for marrying.

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Pondering why angels said Allah place upon it one who causes corruption therein and sheds blood?

In the name of Allah, the Most Merciful, the Most Compassionate.

(2:30) And when your Lord said to the angels, “Indeed, I will make upon the earth a successive authority.” They said, “Will You place upon it one who causes corruption therein and sheds blood, while we declare Your praise and sanctify You?” Allah said, “Indeed, I know that which you do not know.”

I have been pondering about this Aaya for long time until recently I heard from Shaykh Al-Hameedy explained it so beautifully: “Since angels were created purely obedient to Allah’s orders, so when they knew Allah was going to create human beings and blessed us with free thinking, free mind and free choices, the Angels already knew there will be bloodshed and injustice (the consequences what our hands bring when one can choose to follow other than Allah) because Allah’s creation and orders are perfect. Everything is created with balance and harmony, nothing more, nothing less.” Imagine when the world just slightly increased 1 degree celsius, how much impact it has on the animals’ and insects’ lifecycle, and look at our bodies or land, ocean, etc.

Allah has blessed us with free mind, free thinking and free choice, but it’s the same human beings want to take away others’ freedom when Allah said no compulsion in believing in Him. Whoever wants to control others’ freedom of thinking is like declaring they’re more important than God. In history throughout, they are not lack of.

Allah has given women lots of rights. The first university in the world was built by a Muslim sister ( reference from 1001 Inventions Muslim Heritage in Our world) and the current universities are still using the same model. However, look what is the Muslim women’s literacy rate especially in Muslim-dominated area nowadays?

Allah has repeatedly reminded us Taqwa (conscience) and taught us how to deal with family, relatives, orphans, Muslims and non Muslims, how to deal with money, deal with calamity, being justice to everyone no matter their faith and background, even if it’s against our own self.  However, look at how many women are suffering from domestic violence? Some even not allowed to call to parents after marriage. How Muslims are turning blind eyes, complicit in it or being biased to the injustice happening everywhere everyday? Besides blaming the work of Shaitan, what else? Why don’t we look into our intentions and actions? When Allah guarantee a real believer will have upper hand in the situation, besides blaming others, don’t we have responsibilities to fix our own root problems?

Allah has showed us His utmost Mercy and Forgiveness since He forgive all kinds of sins EXCEPT one worshiped other than Allah. When we witness groups introduced strange practice in Islam, majority of us remain silent because not want to offend the relationship or friendship, even worst is to justify the practice.

Allah has given us a guidance – the Quran, and Prophet’s (peace be upon him) teaching – the Hadith, if we follow through, we should be the person as He mentioned in the Quran that the best of the nation. However, we allow the culture of the surrounding eating away the real Islamic teaching. We let culture to trump Islam and confused many to believe the right is wrong, the wrong is right. We care too much physical appearance and ignore the real inner core teaching.  We fear too much everyone, anyone but Allah.

When Allah gives protection, no one can be harm. When Allah give guidance, no matter what others say or do, no one can be misguided. Allah also guarantee that Shaitan has no rights over His followers.

This is a serious Aaya (verse) to understand, to realize. It’s not Allah created all these horrible human beings, it’s us, the human beings not follow His Teachings, also takeaway God given rights from others or consent to it, worst is Muslims who claimed to have the guidance but how much we follow and pollute the teaching, as a result to cause all these dire consequences. May Allah forgive all our weaknesses and shortcomings and guide us to the Right Path that Allah loves.

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What is Quran?

Al-Baqara
(2:1) Alif, Lam, Meem.
(2:2) This is the Book about which there is no doubt, a guidance for those conscious of Allah –
(2:3) Who believe in the unseen, establish prayer, and spend out of what We have provided for them,
(2:4) And who believe in what has been revealed to you, and what was revealed before you, and of the Hereafter they are certain [in faith].
(2:5) Those are upon [right] guidance from their Lord, and it is those who are the successful.


Alay Imran
(3:2) Allah – there is no deity except Him, the Ever-Living, the Sustainer of existence.
(3:3) He has sent down upon you the Book in truth, confirming what was before it. And He revealed the Torah and the Gospel.
(3:4) Before as a guidance for mankind and also revealed this Al-Furqan [criterion for judgment between right and wrong]. Surely those who reject Allah’s revelations will be sternly punished; Allah is Mighty, capable of retribution.

(3:7) It is He who has sent down to you the Book; in it are verses [that are] precise – they are the foundation of the Book – and others unspecific. As for those in whose hearts is deviation [from truth], they will follow that of it which is unspecific, seeking discord and seeking an interpretation [suitable to them]. And no one knows its [true] interpretation except Allah. But those firm in knowledge say, “We believe in it. All [of it] is from our Lord.” And no one will be reminded except those of understanding.

(3:138) This [the Quran] is a clear declaration to mankind, a guidance and an admonition to those who fear Allah!


An-Nisa
(4:82) Then do they not reflect upon the Qur’an? If it had been from [any] other than Allah, they would have found within it much contradiction.

(4:105) Indeed, We have revealed to you, the Book in truth so you may judge between the people by that which Allah has shown you. So be not an advocate for those who betray trust.
(4:106) And seek forgiveness of Allah. Indeed, Allah is ever Forgiving and Merciful.


Al-A’raf
(7:2) [This is] a Book revealed to you – so let there not be in your breast distress therefrom – that you may warn thereby and as a reminder to the believers.


Hud
(11:1) [This is] a Book whose verses are perfected and then presented in detail from [one who is] Wise and Acquainted.
(11:2) “Do not worship except Allah. Indeed, I am to you from Him a warner and a bringer of good tidings,”
(11:3) And [saying], “Seek forgiveness of your Lord and repent to Him, [and] He will let you enjoy a good provision for a specified term and give every doer of favor his favor. But if you turn away, then indeed, I fear for you the punishment of a great Day.
(11:4) To Allah is your return, and He is over all things competent.”


Yusuf
(12:1) Alif L’am Ra. These are the verses of the Book that make things clear.
(12:2) We have revealed this Quran in the Arabic language so that you may
understand.
(12:3) We relate to you the best of stories through this Quran by Our
revelation to you, though before this you were one of those who did not know.


Al-Hijr
(15:87) And We have certainly given you, seven of the often repeated [verses] and the great Qur’an.
(15:88) Do not extend your eyes toward that by which We have given enjoyment to [certain] categories of the disbelievers, and do not
grieve over them. And lower your wing to the believers
(15:89) And say, “Indeed, I am the clear warner”


An-Nahl
(16:64) And We have not revealed to you the Book except for you to make clear to them that wherein they have differed and as guidance and mercy for a people who believe.

(16:89) And [mention] the Day when We will resurrect among every nation a witness over them from themselves. And We will bring you as a witness over your nation. And We have sent down to you the Book as clarification for all things and as guidance and mercy and good tidings for the Muslims.

(16:97) Whoever does righteousness, whether male or female, while he is a believer – We will surely cause him to live a good life, and We will surely give them their reward [in the Hereafter] according to the best of what they used to do.
(16:98) So when you recite the Qur’an, [first] seek refuge in Allah from Satan, the expelled [from His mercy].
(16:99)Indeed, there is for him no authority over those who have believed and rely upon their Lord.
(16:100) His authority is only over those who take him as an ally and those who through him associate others with Allah.


Al-Isra
(17:78) Establish prayer at the decline of the
sun [from its meridian] until the darkness of the night and [also] the Qur’an
of dawn. Indeed, the recitation of dawn is ever witnessed.
(17:79) And from [part of] the night, pray with it as additional [worship] for you; it is expected that your Lord will resurrect you to a praised station.
(17:80) And say, “My Lord, cause me to enter a sound entrance and to exit a sound exit and grant me from Yourself a supporting authority.”
(17:81) And say, “Truth has come, and falsehood has departed. Indeed is falsehood, [by nature], ever bound to depart.”
(17:82) And We send down of the Qur’an that which is healing and mercy for the believers, but it does not increase the wrongdoers except in loss.


Luqman
(31:2) These are verses of the wise Book,
(31:3) As guidance and mercy for the doers of good
(31:4) Who establish prayer and give zakah, and they, of the Hereafter, are certain [in faith].


Az-Zumar
(39:2) Indeed, We have sent down to you the Book in truth. So worship Allah, [being] sincere to Him in religion.
(39:3) Unquestionably, for Allah is the pure religion. And those who take protectors besides Him [say], “We only worship them that they may bring us nearer to Allah in position.” Indeed, Allah will judge between them concerning that over which they differ. Indeed, Allah does not guide he who is a liar and [confirmed] disbeliever.

(39:41) Indeed, We sent down to you the Book for the people in truth. So whoever is guided – it is for [the benefit of] his soul; and whoever goes astray only goes astray to its detriment. And you are not a manager over them.


Ash-Shura
(42:52) And thus We have revealed to you an inspiration of Our command. You did not know what is the Book or [what is] faith, but We have made it a light by which We guide whom We will of Our servants. And indeed you
guide to a straight path –
(42:53) The path of Allah, to whom belongs whatever is in the heavens and
whatever is on the earth. Unquestionably, to Allah do [all] matters evolve.


Al-Muzzammil
(73:20) Indeed, your Lord knows, that you stand [in prayer] almost two thirds of the night or half of it or a third of it, and [so do] a group of those with you. And Allah determines [the extent of] the night and the day. He has known that you [Muslims] will not be able to do it and has turned to you in forgiveness, so recite what is easy [for you] of the Qur’an. He has known that there will be among you those who are ill and others traveling throughout the land seeking [something] of the bounty of Allah and others fighting for the cause of Allah. So recite what is easy from it and establish prayer and give zakah and loan Allah a goodly loan. And whatever good you put forward for yourselves – you will find it with Allah. It is better and greater in reward. And seek forgiveness of Allah. Indeed, Allah is Forgiving and Merciful.

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Reminder of a Islamic Will document

Important reminder Islamic Will – a Must document in Islam 

Every individual Muslim should have this document ready. A person who has house, car, money in account (etc) and have children must prepare will immediately. A person who has nothing mentioned above, should prepare Will because he still has his body. Yes that’s correct body.

Why?  Here is business case… Three incidents in Windsor Ontario

1. Person died on Islam family members wanted him cremated. Imam tried convincing them no success. This guy never prepared will stating his funeral should be according to Islamic belief

2. Family (parents) died social services took over custody of children. Later adopted by non-Muslims.

3. Person died and assets went to estate after all distribution process. End receiver received peanut most used up by official departments involved such as bank, lawyers etc

4. On 12 Jan 2019 was a Janaza (funeral) of a 27 year old young man died in apartment found by police after a week when neighbours complained smell from the apartment. If identity would have not established he could end up in cremation as it is cheapest method. 

For your awareness in north America 
– you don’t need lawyer – you don’t need to pay any one to prepare will for you
– you don’t need to have document endorse by any department what so ever 
How to prepare? 
– print 2 copies of ready to go Will document /template from this link https://windsorislamicassociation.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/WIA-IslamicWill-1.pdf
– fill in the blanks 
– have two people witness that you signed these papers… Each page 
– keep one copy at home, one in the bank safety box if you have, otherwise some in safe place
– Windsor dominion masjid offers free service to keep a copy for you in masjid’s safe box 
– announce with in your family, extended family and friends that you have prepared Will, so in case something happens all have information about your will.

Please pass it to other fellow Muslims in neighbourhood and offer them support in making one you will be getting rewards. Jzk

WINDSOR ISLAMIC ASSOCIATION DISCLAIMER
This prototype document was prepared by the Windsor Islamic Association, (WIA henceforth), through consultation with lawyers, religious scholars and review of several such documents from other major Islamic centers, to facilitate the completion of this essential religious obligation. This document is designed to be used as a reference and template. The WIA does not assume any legal responsibly and does not carry any liability in relation to the use of this document. Furthermore, being a religious organization, the WIA cannot be named as an “executor” or guardian in any will, and will not accept such delegation. However WIA can nominate and appoint a qualified individual to be executor of this Last Will and Testament in the event that the person (s) appointed are unwilling or unable. All mature Muslims are obligated to prepare, to update, and secure their wills. Consultation with qualified Islamic scholars and obtaining legal council to customize, and to legalize this document is advised.
This document, both in paper and electronic formats, may be shared, copied, downloaded, and printed only to be used for its intended purpose. Commercial use, all or in part is strictly prohibited.

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Why I don’t wear Niqab?

By Fiona Holly

Before I become Muslim, I used to think the lady with hijab (a cloth that cover hair) were nuns since I was very ignorant or not care about religion. When I was learning Islam, one day I went out with few Muslim sisters to have lunch together and we were taking a train. Suddenly one of the born Muslim sisters screamed out as two sisters with niqab (a face veil) were passing by us. I was shocked and I asked her why she screamed since they’re also Muslims. The young sister said she just had a sudden shock to see them but not intention to embarrass them.

After that incident, I realized it’s not only Non-Muslims were scary with someone with face veil but also some Muslims. When I learned more about Islam, I tend to respect everyone with different choices of their dressings, including sisters who have or have no hijab, also sisters with niqab. When I started to wear hijab, it’s already a big deal in my community, in the society in general. When I know my way of dress is a symbol of representing Islam, so I want to make myself to be available to meet with everyone who has question rather than keeping people away from me with lots of unanswered prejudice.

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The Born-Muslim Reaction to Reverts

By Cara Joy

In the name of Allah, the Gracious, the Merciful

I would like to begin this thought by noting that many efforts to help reverts comes from a really good place. May Allah (God) bring them reward for their intent, Ameen.

Throughout my few years as a Muslim revert, Alhamdulillah (all praise is due to Allah), I have noticed an interesting dichotomy of responses towards Muslim reverts from born-Muslims. Continue reading The Born-Muslim Reaction to Reverts

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Jesus Christ, peace be upon him, in Quran

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful

Alay Imran
(3:35) When the wife of ‘Imran said, “My Lord, indeed I have pledged to You what is in my womb, consecrated [for Your service], so accept this from me. Indeed, You are the Hearing, the Knowing.”
(3:36) But when she delivered her, she said, “My Lord, I have delivered a female.” And Allah was most knowing of what she delivered, “And the male is not like the female. And I have named her Mary, and I seek refuge for her in You and [for] her descendants from Satan, the expelled [from the mercy of Allah].”
(3:37) So her Lord accepted her with good acceptance and caused her to grow in a good manner and put her in the care of Zechariah. Every time Zechariah entered upon her in the prayer chamber, he found with her provision. He said, “O Mary, from where is this [coming] to you?” She said, “It is from Allah. Indeed, Allah provides for whom He wills without account.”
(3:38) At that, Zechariah called upon his Lord, saying, “My Lord, grant me from Yourself a good offspring. Indeed, You are the Hearer of supplication.”
(3:42) And [mention] when the angels said, “O Mary, indeed Allah has chosen you and purified you and chosen you above the women of the worlds. Continue reading Jesus Christ, peace be upon him, in Quran

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To Allah we belong and to Him we shall return

Inna lillaahi Wa Inna ilayhi Raaji’uun
It means “To Allah we belong and to Him we shall return”

We say this statement when someone dies.

Also some of us may say this sentence when we lose something, suffer a setback or harm. But, do you know what it means?

Sure, everyone know that it obviously means ‘To Allah we belong and to Him is our return.’ But, that’s not what here is talking about.

Do you REALLY, TRULY understand these words and their implications in a Muslim’s life? It means …whatever we have is not really ours.

It belongs to Allah.
Continue reading To Allah we belong and to Him we shall return