Bismillah,
Assalaamu alaikum wa ramatullah wa barakatu,
I would like to take the opportunity to share with you *My Journey to Islam* and I feel that by sharing this experience with you I could possibly help you on your journey through life.
We are all born into different cultures, countries and religions in what often seems a confusing and troubled world. Actually, when we examine the world around us, we can easily see what a troubled state it is in: war, poverty, crime and biggest of all Corruption. Need I go on? So, when we look at our own upbringing and our education, how can we be sure that all the things that we have been told, are in reality the truth? Unfortunately, most people in the world choose to turn a blind eye to the root cause of worlds’ problems, and live the life for the worldly pleasures.
It has only been 3 months since I officially said my Shahada but It feels as though Islam has been in my heart for much longer, buried deep down underneath the surface. And with each and every struggle it would manifest in such manner where i would have this amazing amount of strength to go through that which seemed insurmountable. Now, that I rewind the film of my life events, I can with certainty say, Allah swt pulled me through it all and he knew why he was doing it.
I grew up in a Roman Catholic home, as a middle child of three, my sister, myself and my brother. My father passed away very young, at the age of 38, my mom was a widow at the age of 34. Throughout my life I heard about God on daily basis. It was instilled in us from my mother, a very pious woman, who still to this day prays 3&4 times a day. My Hero. My Rock. May Allah SWT bless her.
I had a near death experience at the age of 6months as well as after the birth of my, now, 5year old son. Alhamdulillah, may Allah grant me wisdom, strength and patience to raise him to His likings. Throughout my whole life I was facing challenges, obstacles, hardship of various degrees. Needless to say I was always praying. I stopped going to church a long time ago, stopped doing so may things the church taught us (confession, Sunday Mass etc) it just didn’t feel right, I had doubts, I had questions, but I never made it a priority, to find those answers, because living my life was more important. Situational irony. I used to pray at home, most times so mechanically, just to get it over with. I cried when I was really stuck, I called upon him, I asked…most times my prayers were answered, not always in the way I wished but I was granted ease, but on the contrary I always felt empty inside.
Not too long ago, while going through another episode of hardship, I met a revert, a male figure in my life who accepted Islam at the age of 16, MashaAllah. As we learnt about one another, Islam was always a part of our conversations. It didn’t strike any interest from me, at all, as it contradicted everything I was taught to believe, everything my ancestors believed, regardless of my own doubts..I found it annoying after a while and would just consciously disconnect during those conversations. He was so passionate about it so much so that often he would take Qur’an out of his bag and reference to it. SubhanaAllah 🙂 Not very long after, in the midst of yet another life crisis, strangest urge pulled me towards Islam, precisely via YouTube. I felt the need to find out what it was all about. So I typed word *Islam* in the search bar and the first choice available was Ustadh Nouman Ali Khans’ lecture on Beauty of Islam, Alhamdulillah. Everything snowballed from there. I was listening to lectures 3-4 hours per day, started praying almost immediately. Although I had no clue what and how I was supposed to do it, I bowed down, I prostrated I thanked. At this point, My past life made insignificant and very little sense, nevertheless, my future was about to commence with my heart fully immersed into Allahs’ love.
I Haven’t stopped listening to lectures since then. The interpretation of the Quranic translations and Tafseer put everything in such perspective that I was left wondering how I lived so lost for so long. My love for Islam was instantaneous, Among so many attributes and facts, what I loved the most about Qur’an is that it is textually coherent (i.e. not contradictory within its own text), it is factually correct, it is in harmony with the logical principles that govern normal human behavior.
Tears still fill my eyes, I cannot believe that Allah has brought me here and allowed me to hear his words, Allah saved me again, I think over and over again, and I bow down to Him, to my Creator, to my close, intimate Friend.